Pulchritudinous

Pulchritudinous. It means beautiful. Ravishing. Treasured. Admirable. In other words, pulchritudinous is the exact opposite of what the world and the media and society make you believe that you are. Wait, that's wrong. You are worthy of that title if you do what the world says you're supposed to do. If you show a little more. If you have one more. If you go a little further. If you make a couple more people feel bad. But, lately, I've found out that none of this works for me. None of it seems satisfying or uplifting or worthwhile - or even intriguing.

It's not worth it. It will never be worth it. To me.

And I started to feel totally and completely hopeless. How do I live in a world and a generation that puts so much emphasis on things that I have absolutely no desire to be a part of? How do I live in a generation that is fixated on nothing but this generation? It's a scary thought for me. I wanted so badly for so long to be accepted and to be popular and to be that "it" girl. But I couldn't do what was necessary to accomplish that coveted title.

I'm not an ignorant person by any stretch of the imagination, but I do have morals and standards and boundaries that many of my peers would look at and literally laugh out loud. I'm not the "norm". But before I get too far ahead of myself, I have to stop and say that this by no means gives me the right to judge anyone else. It's not my life. It's not my choice. Therefore, it is not my place to judge. Plus, I'm the farthest thing from a saint myself. I am a poor, miserable, stupid, selfish, lost sinner. But I will not budge for one moment when it comes to my convictions. And that's the truth.

C.S. Lewis once said something along the lines of, "If nothing on earth can ever satisfy your desire fully, then you know you were made for something more." Well said, I think. You see, we get so wrapped up in nothing but sheer, utter clutter that we lose sight of what we're pursuing. Essentially, by living for these things, we forget what we're living for. We forget what we'd even die for. And I thought these verses below described my situation perfectly. In a world where, sadly, active Christian has become a scrutinized, heckled minority.

1 Corinthians 9:24-27: Do you not know that in a race all the runners run, but only one gets the prize? Run in such a way as to get the prize. Everyone who competes in the games goes into strict training. They do it to get a crown that will not last, but we do it to get a crown that will last forever. Therefore I do not run like someone running aimlessly; I do not fight like a boxer beating the air. No, I strike a blow to my body and make it my slave so that after I have preached to others, I myself will not be disqualified for the prize.

Right on, Paul. I may not be seen as a "catch" in this world, but I am positive that I am a "catch" in the arms of my Savior. Heck, maybe even a little pulchritudinous.

Music to Note

I'm sorry that there hasn't been a "Music to Note" post on my blog in quite some time. Truth be told, I forgot all about it. But I won't forget from now on because there is so much incredible - and totally unknown - music to be discovered and enjoyed.

This is Nina Nesbitt, and she's covering a song by Example entitled "Stay Awake". She's from Edinburgh in the UK and has a pretty crazy style that we, unfortunately, don't get much here in the U.S. But let me tell you, her voice is to-die-for. And it's totally real.

She was undiscovered until she happened to run into Ed Sheeran one day, and he asked her to play a song for him. She did. He liked it. And the rest is history. She was asked to open on Sheeran's European tour and actually was a part of his music video for the song "Drunk".

You won't hear a voice like hers everyday. So feel free to fall in love with it.

Quotes Worth Quoting

I don't know why, but lately I have been really into quotes. Simple quotes. Profound quotes. Short quotes. Long quotes. Laugh-inducing quotes. Serious quotes. Quotes. I just can't get enough of them. And I don't want to keep them all to myself because that would just be crime. So I thought I'd share a week's worth of pretty incredible quotes. Feel free to read them all at once, or even keep the suspense going by reading one at a time. Whatever floats your boat. And then try to make that quote a reality for you on that day, or perhaps, from that day forward. A couple quotes may mess with your head, but I hope and pray that all of them mess with your heart.

Day 1: "Time you enjoyed wasting is not wasted time." -T.S. Elliot

Day 2: "If you want others to be happy, practice compassion. If YOU want to be happy, practice compassion." -Dalai Lama

Day 3: "In skating over thin ice, our safety is in our speed." -Ralph Waldo Emerson

Day 4: "A great social success is a pretty girl who plays her cards as carefully as if she were plain." -F. Scott Fitzgerald

Day 5: "Talent is God-given. Be humble. Fame is man-given. Be grateful. Conceit is self-given. Be careful." -John Wooden

Day 6: "Let us live so that when we come to die even the undertaker will be sorry." -Mark Twain

Day 7: "Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat; or about your body, what you will wear. Life is more than food, and the body more than clothes. Consider the ravens: They do not sow or reap, they have no storeroom or barn; yet God feeds them. And how much more valuable you are than birds! Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to your life? Since you cannot do this very little thing, why do you worry about the rest?" -Jesus Christ

Take(n) For Granted

You know that overused saying about not knowing what you've got until it's gone? I've always hated it. And I don't hate it because it's overused or because it doesn't make sense. I hate it because it's so utterly, unbelievably, undeniably, in-your-face valid. It's true. And I know what it's like to experience both sides of the situation: the taking for granted and the taken for granted. But I've found that neither side is enjoyable. At least, not for an extended period of time.

I guess for the longest time I found it so easy to notice when I was the one being taken for granted. So easy to feel sorry for myself. So easy to desperately want others to feel sorry for me too. But I couldn't for the life of me ever notice when I was the one causing someone around me to feel that same way. I took for granted the fact that they felt taken for granted. And I didn't care.

But recently, I have found myself extremely humbled. I realize what a selfish, ignorant, big-headed person I can be when I let myself become a selfish, ignorant, big-headed person. And I'm sad to say that it took losing touch with a friend for me to realize it. It took their absence to prove to me what a tremendous presence they had in my life. And here's what other conclusions I've come to:

Everything that person used to do that you classified as "annoying" just doesn't seem as annoying anymore. Conversations that once seemed dragged out or useless start to seem pretty darn worthwhile. Jokes that once seemed lame or tired seem like hilarious, fun-filled mood boosters. All the times and the talks and the laughs have been taken for granted. Taken so much for granted that when that person is no longer there, your life will not be the same for quite some time. If ever.

And you start to feel bad for yourself. So bad for yourself. When in reality, this pain that you're feeling is nothing more than a consequence of your stupid, careless, self-absorbed actions.

So what do you do? You learn from it. That's about all that you can do. You open up your blind eyes and decide then and there that you will never make anyone feel like they are not a valued piece of your life ever again. You spend more time talking with people than about them. You spend more time giving people positive reinforcement than tearing them down. You spend more time relishing the presence of others than you do relishing trivial, materialistic clutter. You spend more time forgiving than holding onto mistakes. You spend more time looking at faces than at screens. You spend more time letting people know how much they mean to you than you do bottling it inside. You invest.

And you never, ever, ever take a person for granted.

Dating: An Endangered Concept

Sometimes - actually, a lot of times - I have these incredible revelations. I realize things. Things about myself, things about others, things about this out-of-this-world world we live in. And truthfully, I would say over half of these so-called revelations hit me not when I'm in a classroom or watching television or reading something intelligent. Rather, they hit me while I'm sitting in a retirement home near my house, visiting my "adopted grandparents". Sweet little, crackly-voiced Verna and her well-seasoned, dry-humored husband Bill. They're old. But oh, they are some of my favorite people to talk with, to share with, to laugh with, to listen to, to hug and love and cherish. In other words, they're pretty darn cool.

And I've always been enamored with old couples like Bill and Verna. I find them weirdly inspiring. Maybe it's because they've spent so many years together. And lasted. Maybe it's because they have a genuine and sincere love for one another. Maybe it's because they prove the superficial, shallow, impulsive mentality of my generation way wrong. And I like it.

When I did a biography about Verna for a class awhile ago, she insisted that we include boys as a part of her story. As she recounted it all for me, she spoke of boyfriend after boyfriend, and soon I was sitting there thinking, Here we go again. Even my "grandma" knows more about boys than me. What is this, some kind of joke? Perhaps it was the funny look on my face or perhaps it was the fact that she just wanted to clarify. Either way, she felt the need to let me know what her idea of a boyfriend entailed. She said, "You're probably thinking, "Oh my," but let me tell ya, our boyfriends back then weren't anything real serious. Boyfriend had a different meaning. We just kind of looked at each other with special eyes. And sometimes we'd see a picture show together." And that was the extent of it. It's a concept called dating. And call me crazy, but it sounds intriguing.

Now, you're probably thinking I don't get out much. You're thinking that I'm some ignorant loser for having never heard of dating. But I'm talking real dating. Not the "you're my girlfriend/boyfriend so now we can go on a date" thing. Or the one time little fling from the bar. That's not the dating I mean.

Why is it so wrong to go on a couple of dates here and there without being exclusive? It's not. And why is it so difficult to keep it a little wholesome and fall in love with their personality first? It doesn't have to be. The problem is due to the fact that we're either too afraid or too rushed. We worry that people will assume that our casual date is something more than casual before we've decided that for ourselves. Or we rush. We justify skipping the "getting to know each other" part by trying to get to know each other in all the wrong ways. And then the potential relationship is based on a whole bunch of potential nothing.

But who cares. This is the present, right? That's how it is now. And for many people, that works. But my wish is that dating could be like fashion. You know, where the old stuff comes back in style later? Yes; that's what I would like. I mean, a girl can dream. And for an old-fashioned girl like me, that's a heck of a lot of dreaming.

So. Here goes nothing.

There's No Such Thing as Being Bored

Boredom. Is it real or just a made up thing that makes us think that we have nothing to do except think we are bored? I'm going to go with the second one, but I won't repeat it because that was an extremely long concept. In my mind, it's a lot like high-definition TV. Now I know most people think I'm weird when I say this, but I like to believe that HD TV does not exist. It's all simply a figment of our imaginations. We think that the picture is going to be way clearer, so naturally, it seems way clearer. Does HD really exist? Probably. But it just makes me so much happier to think that it doesn't.

So, back to being bored. I think that if you don't want boredom to be real, then it never has to become a reality for you. But this post is not some scientific breakdown of what makes some people bored and other people not bored. It's about what to do when you feel like boredom is closing in on you. Trust me; there's hope.

Say, you and your friends are stuck in line for a huge rollercoaster. And you're going to be stuck there for quite awhile. Don't panic and get bored. Just get busy. My personal favorite anti-boredom remedy in this type of situation is a little game I like to call "Hey Guys! That Looks Like _______" The title of the game pretty much explains it all, but in case you're still not understanding, the object of the game is to look all around you and attempt to find someone who looks a lot like someone you and your friends already know. Just try not to be too mean. I've also found that this one is great to play on a long subway ride in New York. So feel free to use it in any potentially boring and crowded place.

And if you are on a long roadtrip and aren't lucky enough to own car bingo, this next game is a great time-waster. I call it "Wait, Wait, Wait, Is That A Boy Or A Girl?" All you have to do is look in the windows of the cars as they pass you or you pass them and wait for one that fits the scenario. Sometimes you can even add hints as to which gender you're leaning toward, such as "Hint: The name's Pat." Although if you think about it, that really isn't much of a hint at all.

Then there's the initial game. I never gave this one a fancy name. So that's why it's just called the initial game. In this one, the first person starts by saying a person's first and last name. It could be someone famous or someone that everyone in the group knows or has heard of. Then, the next person has to take the last letter of that person's last name and think of a name that starts with that letter. For example, I could begin the game by saying, "Nicki Minaj." And then the next person would say, "Joseph Gordon-Levitt." And then the next person would say, "Tina Fey." And so on. And don't forget that you can use non-famous names too.

But if all else fails, there's always the standard "Here's A Movie or TV Show Quote And It's Your Job To Guess What Movie or TV Show This Is From" game. This is where you think of a quote from a great movie or  tv show and then have your friends or family members guess what great movie or tv show that quote is from. Pretty self-explanatory. For example, I might say, "I want all of you, forever, you and me, everyday." And then everyone would yell, "The Notebook, yeah!" It's really a fun time.

So, the point of this post is to show that you never have to be the b-word. Bored, that is. Just learn to make nothing, something.

I'm Indecisive...Or Am I?

Decisions, decisions, decisions. There are so many decisions. So many choices. So many picks. So many "this one's" or "that one's". So many potential game-changers. And for a person like me, this is terrifying. Absolutely, sickeningly, terrifyingly terrifying.

And maybe that's partly due to the fact that I am a straight up, stage five incapable of making a decision-er. Yeah; you heard me correctly. I am incapable of making a decision to save my life. It's the perfectionist in me that won't allow me to decide on something until I believe it is sheer perfection. And nothing less. I don't care if it takes me 5 minutes to decide or 5 weeks, I want it to be right. Which can makes things pretty complicated when you're deciding on something as simple as where to go to dinner.

But then there are things that are a little bit bigger. A little bit more potentially life-changing. And when these things are approaching, it's hard to keep dodging the what-ifs, the coulda-shoulda-woulda's, the looming doubts. If I go to this university, it will be the best launching pad for my planned career in  journalism. But if I go here, I'll be able to keep more in tune with my faith life. Oh, but wait. If I go there, the location will allow me to step outside my comfort zone and enter uncharted waters. Oh my gosh, but this place offers the best study abroad opportunity in London. But hey, this one's close to my  family. AHHH.

It's insane. It's nuts. It's impossible. So I've decided that I'm just going to have to sit this next part of my life out and live in my parents' basement. Umm. NO. People don't do that. People with any sort of ambition or drive don't do that. They can't do that. You can't let life's attempts to intimidate you, intimidate you. And for heaven's sake, stop trying to please everyone. Stop trying to be that person that you're expected to be, and start being that person that you were made to be. You know, the "you" that is actually you?

And when you strip away all of these expectations and the outside "help" and the desire to impress and the stupid input that really has no place in your life at all and the pressure and the questions and the what-ifs and, oh, how could I forget? The opinions of your peers. Wait. Where was I? Oh yes. When you strip away all of this no-good nonsense, decisions really aren't that big of a deal. In fact, the decision has already been made. Because it depends on you. And what is good for you. And what is right for you. And what is wonderful - and wanderfull - for you. Now, is that so bad?

In all honesty, I'm still deciding for myself.

FARAH AND RUPP, RUPP AND FARAH

Mo Farah. Galen Rupp. History making Olympic 10k. Gold and silver. Undeniably inspiring. Well done. Well done. Well done. Enough Said.

The Book Thief Has Stolen My Heart

To say that this book has stolen my heart is an understatement. The understatement of the century, to be more specific. Truth be told, this book has taken my heart and moved it and molded it and prodded it and battered it and then tried with all its might to piece it back together again. Forget the Backstreet Boys, Markus Zusak is the true master when it comes to "playing games with my heart". Millions of hearts for that matter.

Now I'm one of those people who tries desperately to convince myself that I don't like reading. I've always been that way, and I hate it. Because not only do I not not like reading, I also love it. Quite a bit. I guess all these years I've just tried to tell myself otherwise because when it comes to books, I have a serious problem. Once I pick one up, I can't put it back down. Until it's done. Otherwise I worry about all of the characters, and I feel like a busy mother who's always missing milestones in the lives of her children. I seriously whole-heartedly miss them when I'm not reading about them.

But when a good book rolls around, I'm willing to sacrifice a couple of days and a little bit of heartache for the cause. So when everyone in my house was raving about this book for days on end, I knew I had to take the plunge. A plunge that I will never forget. Or regret.

The Book Thief is written in an inexplicable way. I've never seen it done quite the same, which obviously makes it pretty inexplicable. It's so saturated with detail that the pages are literally dripping. In a totally figurative way. At first, you'll probably be a little intimidated by the whole thing, but I can guarantee that after this initial onslaught of hesitance, you will begin to crave each detail. And then revel in it.

Now to the story itself. It's set in Nazi Germany. I know what you're thinking, Been there, read that. No you haven't. You hear the gruesome stories from the concentration camps. The lives of the Jewish prisoners and the Nazis themselves. But you never hear the story of what life was like for the average, small-village German. Not a hardcore Nazi. Not a Jew. And that's what this story is about. Pretty simple, aside from the fact that it's told from the perspective of Death. You got it, Death himself is the narrator.

Little Leisel Meminger, the star of the show, is a young German girl who is taken to live with foster parents in order to protect her from the ravages surrounding her communist parents. But on the journey to this foster home, Death visits Leisel and her little brother for the first time. And so begins their relationship. Leisel and Death, that is. But there was no way she could know at that time that it was the first of many visits. The many times in her life where she would cheat death. And then be left with nothing but the grief.

And I really want to tell you so much more, but that would make me feel like a criminal for stealing what could potentially be an unforgettable experience for you.

So I dare you to read this. I dare you to fall in love with the characters. I dare you to let your perspective on reading, or perhaps your life itself be forever changed. I dare you to embark on the most challenging, emotional, moving journey of your life. I dare you.

Time in a Capsule

The other day my brother and I were watching Full House, which is absolutely no surprise to those who know us best. This daily watching was a one time occurrence about a year and a half ago that quickly became a tradition in the summer. In fact, it's a pretty easy tradition to keep up with considering I have every season from 1 to 8 on DVD. All 192 gloriously action-packed, effortlessly family-friendly, heart-warmingly classic episodes. To put it simply, I like the show. I like it a lot. So much so that I have a friend who calls it "Bethany House". It's gotten to the point where Bob Saget is not Bob Saget. He's Danny Tanner. Heck, he's Mr. T. Mary-Kate and Ashley aren't overly-dressed, sad-looking "fashion designers", they're still Michelle Tanner. But wait a second, I've just realized that this is not at all what this post is about. Sorry, but once I start talking about the Tanners, I just can't stop.

Anyway, the other day, we were watching an episode where you see little Danny and little Joey (via flashback) bury a time capsule. And then twenty years later (present time on the show) they dig it up and rediscover their baseball cap and insult joke book from ages before. And as I watched them and took it all in, it hit me. I want to construct a time capsule. But I'm not going to put a cap and a joke book it in. That would be weird.

Since this is my senior year of high school, I thought, "Perfect. Forget about going out with a bang. We're going out with a capsule." And not just any old capsule. Due to the fact that there are almost 100 people to account for (50 of which will be enthusiastic about it), that would take up an ungodly amount of space. Which would call for a big time capsule. Which would call for a big chunk of money. Which would not happen.

So then, with the help of my mom of course, I hit the jackpot. Figuratively. How about instead of having each person contribute something huge like a tuba or a beanbag chair to remember them by, we just revamp and revitalize the whole idea?

I'm talking, each person contributes a small sheet of paper that includes their name and one other thing: where they picture themselves ten years from that day. What are their hopes. Their dreams. Their career aspirations. Do they want four kids and a cat and a top-of-the-line minivan? Do they picture themselves on Broadway, in a faraway land, or still in high school? Would they like to be married to a certain person or, more importantly, have a certain kind of dog? Where will they live? What will they live in? Does that young man really plan on being as immature as he was all throughout high school? I could sit here and list ideas all day long.

But my point is that it would be absolutely incredible to do. It would be amazing to dig that thing up and bust that thing out during the tenth anniversary reunion of my high school class. We'd see who followed their plan to a "t". We'd see who failed miserably but still managed to have the highest salary of the bunch. We'd see that guy who was indeed just as immature as he was in high school. Man, we would see it all. And I think it would be great.

So that's what I'm going to do. It will making growing ten years older a little bit easier and a little bit more wanderfull.